Whiteout?

At times such as these, when some part of my daily life has been completely thrown off course, I tend to get a little religious. The snow, although very beautiful, has gone and messed with my precious satellite causing all the channels to look like some avant garde black and white pattern that only a flamboyantly gay man would have the guts to wear; and even then only on a tie. I find myself doing that stupid "Oh God, if you can hear me, yeah me Carmen, I know I haven't prayed in a while, umm...I guess since 3 years ago in a power outage, but if you bring me back all me 203756 channels I promise I'll donate something I don't care very much about to a charitable foundation."

I'm actually watching the food network right now, my favourite channel, and savouring the audio. But here's the thing, and watch out now because this may be a rude awakening for some, I think the success of TV is directly based on the fact that you can SEE WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON! Huh huh? Video killed the radio star? Not at this rate with a black and white crap fest splashed across the screen teasing me with that dudes voice from "Chef at Large". Maybe God's trying to teach me a lesson: you don't know what you got 'til it's gone.

Oh god, now they're making a dessert that has a French name. That's like having some psycho break into your house, realizing it's someone you went to elementary school with, listening and watching in horror as they tell you about how jealous they were when you beat them in basketball so now they're gonna slice up your arm...and then they do it! But wait, right before they leave they jab the knife in your eye and you're all "I thought this was about my arm?!" and they say something like "Yeah I dunno, that wasn't even pre-meditated, I just felt like it," before peaceing out. How you say? Adding insult to injury?

What's actually sad about all this is that after watching COPIOUS hours of different cooking shows, I still manage to eat chocolate bars for dinner.

And not even chocolat bars.