Thursday, August 10, 2006

Renaissance Woman


I was driving in my car today, thinking about what a fun person I'd be with a lifetime prescription of Valium, and trying very hard not to spill greek pita in my lap. I don't think it would even matter if it was my friends taking the Valium or myself, as long as one of us had pink happiness in our system we'd be good as a collective group.

I was listening to The Beatles telling me that money can't buy love and I felt a little better provided that I'm basically one step up from hobo.

I thought back to highschool when I used to worry immensely that the feta they had used in my pita was probably full fat and not light. I sighed. My worries have since moved on from cheese and calorie contents to much more substantial, knock the wind out of you stresses. I think this should bring me some ironic sense of pride, you know, because now my anxiety attacks are so grown up. There is a progression somewhere here that really needs to be acknowledged.

I spilled tzatziki down my chin and tried to wipe it up without smashing into the car infront of me. Mission accomplished.

A fire truck flew by and no one really moved out of the way. There were some half-assed fear induced attempts, but really, I couldn't call them more than attempts. Some people braked a bit, but in a united effort, we all did nothing. I could blame my apathy on the fact that I was concentrating so deeply on my delicious pita, but that would only be half true. I accept partial responsibility for the apocalypse right now. As for everyone else, I'm not sure what they were thinking. Maybe it was something along the lines of "I NEED TO GO GET MY EMO-LATTE AT JJ BEAN!" Starbucks is only for ignorant, corporate supporting, bastards, ugh. Excuse me while I go put these free-range egg shells in my organic compost.

My drive was insignificant in the course of things, my destination hardly important, but amidst all the futility, I was a mother fucking multi tasker. Yeah that's right planet earth, I MULTI TASKED TODAY!

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm happy you have a picture today, but don't multi-task when you're driving.

bullamoocow

9:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey you! i come home soon so you know what that means!! put down the valium pick up the vodka! i wuv you....

9:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i dont know about fair trade coffee and all that corporate jazz, but starbucks is a proud sponsor of the war in afghanistan, and today in Lebanon. I believe it's the executive director that's an active zionist...

10:34 PM  
Blogger PatZ said...

free range eggs are weird, theyre all orange instead of yellow. its sort of creepy...

12:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You achieved synergy across multiple touchpoints!

6:50 AM  

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