I laughed regardless of my bleeding eardrums

Last night ended up being pretty random and unplanned. It was one of those situations where no real plans were made so you resort to the lowest common denominator; trying to pass off Italian spice mix as pot so you can sell it to 13 year olds for last months overdue rent. Alright, I'm joking, I actually just went to the "local pub" with Al and some friends but the degradation of the whole experience was pretty similar. The night took a swift turn for the better, however, when we realized that we weren't there on any old regular night, we stumbled upon KAREOKE NIGHT! It took me a good minute to understand the full reality of my surroundings and that people were subjecting themselves for the entertainment of others...voluntarily!!! I think my favourite performer had to be the charismatic guy simply named "Motown Man". I'm not sure if he had a real name, or whether that was actually the name his music-loving parents gave him, but regardless, that man could really rip a tune. His sixty-year-old-bleach-blond girlfriend wasn't too bad herself, even though she never sang. Most of the performing crowd looked as though they'd never left the eighties but it kind of added to the hilarity of it all, plus that decade was pretty unforgettable.

At one point my friend actually got up and sang "Ace of Spades" which pretty much brought me the closest I've been to peeing my pants since grade 1. Overall, I'd say the night was a success; I didn't spend a dime but I did, however, tell Al to shoot me in the face if I ever became that old, drunk, and out of touch with the times.

Towards the end of the night when the kareoke had been wrapped up and everyone was heading out, one of the old guys started to address screaming rants to the entire pub, "ANYONE WANNA BE MY SOBER FRIEND AND DRIVE ME HOME? YOU CAN TAKE MY WIFE'S VAN!" Everyone tried to do the whole "I don't hear a crazy hammered man slurring some passionate rant, do you?" kind of deal, and make their way out unscathed. It was going fairly well until I [couldn't help but] burst out laughing when the same guy added "IT'S AMETHYST!". Even in his highly drunken state did he manage to distinguish between varying shades of purple. That man is no fool.